Older adults with advanced cancer are selective in sharing and seeking information with social networks

•Older patients are selective in seeking and sharing information with network members.•Geographical distance, length of relationship, and frequency of communication influence the selective sharing process.•Network members with medical background are sought out for cancer related advice.•Patients characterize conversations about cancer as surface-level, while network members describe more in-depth conversations.•Patients describe decisions as shared, while network members reported the patients made their own decisions.